The episode opens with Jack welcoming Liz, Tracy, and Jenna to "Season 4," a fusion cuisine restaurant which serves the best-selling food from the rest of America; "Cheesy Blasters". Jack uses this to teach them a lesson that they have "lost touch with the heartland of consumers." He believes the cast and crew of TGS have become too elitist and need to change to survive in tough economic times. Towards this goal Jack tells Tracy to reconnect with his roots and Jenna suggests that she can "go country."
Despite the plans for Tracy and Jenna, Jack tells Liz to begin searching for a new cast member to help lessen this elitist image. Liz recruits Pete to help in her search, planning trips to comedy clubs to find new talent. Both agree to try and keep the process secret from the cast and crew for fear that they would be angered over the idea of a new actor joining the cast. Liz and Pete give awkward answers trying to explain why they are going places together and ultimately tells the TGS writing staff. They also inadvertently tell Josh who, angered by the news, quits the show.
Meanwhile, Kenneth goes to Jack worried that he cannot honestly sign his timesheet because Kenneth worked many overtime hours but NBC has stopped paying for it to save money. Jack convinces him to sign the sheet, but Kenneth later accidentally receives a large bonus check of Jack's instead of his own paycheck. Kenneth grows angry over the bonus and leads a page strike. The strike grows in size as other trade unions join it, along with Tracy in an attempt to join the common man. Jack hires a private detective to try and end the strike, but he fails. Finally, Jack admits to Kenneth that he is a "big ol' liar" and Kenneth ends the strike.
Liz sees her books and a cardboard cutout of herself in a bookstore window. She shows Mike, a nametag-wearing employee that she is the author but he grows angry with her, showing a quote from her book "If your man is over thirty and still wears a nametag to work, that's a dealbreaker," and he tears apart her cutout. Several other men including Frank, Lutz, Pete, Tracy, and the janitor yell at her for providing advice which they believed damaged their relationships. Angie Jordan kicked Tracy out of their home and he moves in with Liz as punishment for damaging his marriage. Once there he reads Liz's Dealbreakers book in detail and discovers that much of the book was written directly about him.
Meanwhile, Jack travels to Washington, D.C. to participate in a task force on microwaves as the industry is struggling, but he says he refuses to take any bailout money. He believes the meeting will be quite simple and quick, but once there he is confronted by Devon Banks who has begun working with the federal government. Devon reveals that he has spent the last year since being fired from GE in working to get back at Jack by making connections in the Barack Obama administration. Devon leaks Jack's controversial testimony from the hearing, believing that public pressure will force Jack to resign in three days. Jack spends that time asking the TGS writers—Frank, Lutz and Toofer to come up with an idea "as good as the light bulb" to improve the microwave. They try to incorporate suggestions such as making the microwave bigger or making them break down more often so they require replacement, but Jack eventually abandons the project as a failure. However, instead of leaving GE, Jack convinces Devon to give the company bailout money (which he had previously refused), effectively making Devon Jack's boss.
Kenneth takes some time off from his page duties to volunteer at an animal shelter. He claims his time on a pig farm will allow him to not emotionally connect with the dogs being held there, but he quickly names all of the dogs and adopts the many dogs scheduled to be euthanized that day. Kenneth asks for someone at TGS to adopt the dogs and Tracy quickly brings them all to Liz's apartment to continue annoying her. Liz and Tracy go to Jack to finally resolve their conflict. Jack decides that, because Liz ruined Tracy's life with her book, Tracy should be given the right to ruin her life, and he orders Liz to sign over her life rights to Tracy. Jack tells Liz a story about an accident he had ice climbing, falling into a crevasse. He broke his leg and was unable to climb upwards to escape, but by going deeper down into the crevasse he found a path out. Liz applies this story to her situation with Tracy and stops resisting him, instead suggesting that Tracy make a pornographic film based on her life. Tracy agrees and moves out of Liz's apartment.
The search for a new TGS cast member continues as the episode opens with Jack approaching Liz inquiring how the search has been going. Unhappy with her suggestions of someone from San Francisco, California or Canada, Jack decides to travel with Liz to Kenneth's hometown of Stone Mountain, Georgia to find a comic from "middle America." Liz tries to convince Jack that no part of America is "better" than another, but he disagrees. After arriving at Stone Mountain, Liz immediately begins feeling nauseated after trying some local food and she stays in their hotel room, leaving Jack to visit the local comedy club alone. He finds the act of Rick Wayne and his dummy Pumpkin to be hilarious and demands that he be hired over Liz's objections. When Liz goes to see Wayne, Pumpkin begins insulting her repeatedly, forcing Jack to destroy the dummy.
Meanwhile, Tracy learns that two celebrities have died recently and Frank tells Tracy he should be careful because celebrity deaths tend to come in threes and he might be next. Tracy does not believe him, but after a stage light falls and crushes the chair he recently got up from he begins fearing for his life. Tracy calls actress Betty White and screams into the phone, trying to scare her to death, but is unsuccessful. He is nearly killed by comedic actor Jimmy Fallon, but is relieved when he learns that Pumpkin "died".
Jenna, worried that her position on the show will be lessened with the arrival of a new actor, tries to befriend the TGS writers to ensure good parts will be written for her. The three are initially annoyed by her presence, Frank in particular after Jenna's gay friend insults him. Cerie, however, tells Frank that women get very wild and drunk at "gay Halloween parties" and the three decide to pretend to be Jenna's friend to get into such a party. Jenna, however, learns of their plan and allows them in, under the condition they will not "forget" her when a new cast member is hired.
Liz and Pete have decided to rig the TGS auditions, by planning to add bad actors so that their preferred choice, Jayden Michael Taylor, gets hired by their boss, Jack. Jenna learns that the auditions are taking place and worries that her position on the show will be lessened with the arrival of a new actor. Although Tracy, the star of the show, reassures Jenna that the two have nothing to worry about, she remains uneasy. Later, Jenna discovers that Liz and Pete want Jayden to be cast, but she pleads with Liz to pull Jayden out of his audition. Jenna hates him for humiliating her after working together on a play, but Liz does not change her mind about Jayden. Jenna eventually figures out what Liz and Pete are scheming, so she and Tracy go out and find people and bring them to the TGS auditions.
Meanwhile, Jack learns from Kenneth that he has bedbugs. As a result of being ostracized by his condition, and now feeling passionate, Jack tells Liz to give everyone a chance to audition, after catching her trying to get rid of people trying out. During the audition process, Jack, Liz, and Pete witness auditions from TGS staff writers, NBC news anchor Brian Williams, Kathy Geiss, the daughter of Don Geiss, "Dot Com", former TGS cast member Josh and a robot street performer. During Jayden's audition, Liz realizes that Jayden's suppose references—Gilbert Godfried, Martin Scorsese, and Christopher Walken—were not legit and that Jayden impersonated them. She confronts him about this, however, Jayden plans to blackmail Liz with a camera marked by her fingerprints—that features provocative photos of Jayden, to make it look like Liz would only hire him if he would let her take pictures of his genitals. Liz tries to stop Jack from casting Jayden, though Jack has made up his mind in hiring the robot street performer. Jack casts him after he shook his hand without being concerned that Jack had bedbugs.
Liz, Jack and the rest of the TGS staff welcome Jack Baker, the new cast member, to the show. After realizing that Baker has the same first name as him, Jack quickly decides to rename him Danny. In the previous episode, Danny was hired by Jack from his work as a street performer who dressed up like a robot and had very limited recent experience with "real acting".
Meanwhile, Jack offers Liz the chance to star in a new television pilot based on her "Dealbreakers" sketch. She is initially excited, but Tracy and Jenna convince her to test the market and search for other offers before agreeing to work with Jack. Liz signs with a talent agent to explore other options, but later learns he is a low-level agent. Jack cannot stand Liz's dismissal of him, and as a result, he announces through the media that NBC is moving forward with the pilot's production and calls in Padma Lakshmi as a potential new host in place of Liz. Liz threatens to sue Jack and NBC for the rights to "Dealbreakers", but Jack informs her that NBC owns the rights to it. Liz takes a meeting with Scottie Shofar and Jack meets with Padma. During their respective meetings, however, the two realize that they should work with one another. They shake hands at the end of the episode, agreeing to create the pilot together.
After giving advice to Liz, Tracy and Jenna spend the episode calling themselves "The Problem Solvers" giving the TGS crew advice on their lives. From the moment he arrives, Danny treats Kenneth politely and does not ask him to run any errands for him, a break from how Tracy and Jenna treat him. Danny explains to the two that lower-level people such as pages often rise up to positions where they would be the boss of actors such as themselves, and as a result, he is polite to avoid building bad relationships with potential future bosses. Tracy and Jenna are convinced and also stop asking Kenneth for things. Kenneth becomes upset that he is losing his responsibilities and confronts Danny, driving him to yell at Kenneth. Danny, who is Canadian, has had a hard time pronouncing the word "about", but after yelling at Kenneth, and saying "about" without an accent, thanks Kenneth for helping him.
Liz learns that her apartment building is being converted into a condominium and is told that she must purchase her apartment or face a rent increase. She decides that she wants to buy her apartment and the one above her, and turn them into her dream home. When she learns that her neighbor will not be bribed out of his apartment, she agrees to move in with him, seemingly to save money, hoping to drive him out with her behavior. At work, Liz is disgusted by her staff writer, Frank peeing in bottles to stop global warming. However, she decides to adopt this behavior to force Brian to leave; she is successful.
At the same time, Tracy tells Jack the negative impact fatherhood has had on his life. They both decide to get vasectomies from Dr. Leo Spaceman. While waiting, Jack discovers the respect Tracy's son, Tracy Jr., has for his father. After being put under, Tracy realizes his life is horrible because he does not have a daughter. Luckily, Jack is able to stop Dr. Spaceman before he conducts the procedure.
Meanwhile, Kenneth is put in charge of reducing TGS' carbon footprint. He argues that Frank's habits, albeit disgusting, are actually environmentally friendly. Kenneth gets advice from former Vice President of the United States Al Gore, who tells him to recycle everything "including jokes". At that point, Gore declares that a whale is in trouble and runs off.
The episode opens with Jack and Liz preparing for the beginning of her new talk show, Dealbreakers. Jack's rival, Devon, complicates the situation by threatening to publicly ridicule Jack if the show loses money. Jack, under pressure, begins to interfere with Liz's appearance, sending her over the edge with insecurity. After 510 takes, they finally settle on an opening title to the show. After Liz locks herself in her dressing room, Jack shuts Dealbreakers down, but manages to break even by selling the show's opening titles; in future, whenever a television show is playing in the background of a Sheinhardt Universals soap opera, the Dealbreakers titles will be shown.
Meanwhile, Tracy realizes that although he has two sons with his wife, what is missing from his life is a daughter. As he shops for a special Christmas present for Angie, to try to convince her to have another child, Tracy finds a diamond encrusted "EGOT" necklace and sets a new life goal to achieve EGOT status by winning four major awards: an Emmy, a Grammy, an Oscar, and a Tony. Tracy discovers many EGOT-ers have been composers and aspires to write the most popular song of all time. After failing to combine five popular musical styles into one song, he seeks help from Whoopi Goldberg, an EGOT title holder. Tracy sings his song to Angie and she is so moved she agrees to have another child.
At the same time, staff writer Frank is appointed head writer of the show in Liz's absence. He accepts the role, thinking that there is finally "a cool person in charge". As the day progresses, he begins acting and dressing just like Liz.
Jack and Liz decide to exchange gifts for Christmas. Meanwhile, Jack reconnects with a friend from high school, Nancy Donovan, and ponders the possibility of romance as Nancy's marriage is falling apart. When Liz ends up buying an expensive necktie that Jack already owns, they agree to spend zero dollars on their gifts. Jack gets Liz a program from her performance of The Crucible framed in wood from her high school stage. In return, Liz calls in a bomb threat to Penn Station, keeping Nancy in New York, and finally Jack makes Liz fulfill her dream of meeting Larry Wilcox as Officer Jon Baker from the show CHiPs.
Pete learns that the new actor on the show, Danny, is a talented singer and gives him the Christmas solo as revenge for Jenna not chipping in to tip the cleaning ladies. Upon learning this, Jenna tries to get the janitor to punch him in the throat. When this does not work, she appeals to Danny's Christmas spirit, and they end up doing a duet with Danny singing off-key to make Jenna look good.
Meanwhile, Kenneth is throwing his "Secret Santa Fun Swap", much to the writers' chagrin. Frank, Toofer, and Lutz proclaim they are strict "Verdukians" and have Kenneth give them things they claim to need for "Merlinpeen" (such as meat-lover's pizza and having their teeth flossed). When Tracy tells Kenneth that they made up their religion, he goes into shock at the idea that all religions are made up by man. His faith is restored when the three are arrested for the bomb threat Liz called in, using their phone.
After a crazy New Year's Eve, Jack realizes that while under the influence of alcohol, he left a message on the answering machine of Nancy Donovan, his high school sweetheart. He and Kenneth immediately travel to Massachusetts and break into Nancy's home while she is on vacation, hoping to erase the message. While Kenneth fumbles with the computer, Jack examines the house and finds evidence that Nancy's marriage is reaching its end. They eventually play the message, after Jack finds the voicemail code, in which Jack reminisces about their times in high school German class. In that class, Jack had the name "Klaus" and Nancy had the name "Greta"—and Jack says that he took the class to be with her. Jack decides not to erase the message, but Kenneth does so anyway. When they return to New York, Kenneth realizes that Nancy's voicemail code stands for "Klaus", which means that Nancy does have feelings for Jack.
Meanwhile, Liz accidentally outs her cousin, Randy to his family at a New Year's Eve party, so he comes to live with her in New York. At the same time, Jenna enters a fake relationship with actor James Franco, in order to counteract rumors that he is in love with a Japanese body pillow. Jenna feels slighted when she realizes that she wants a real relationship, and encourages James to follow his own passions, resulting in Jenna ending things with him. Later, Liz and Randy go to a nightclub, where Liz runs into James and his pillow. The two get drunk and end up sleeping together. The next morning, at Liz's apartment, Randy is shocked to see James coming out of Liz's bedroom with his body pillow, and because of this decides to go back home to Pennsylvania.
Meanwhile, Tracy Jordan gets his wife, Angie, pregnant and, realizing his continued hostility to women, tells Grizz Griswold, "Dot Com" and Kenneth that he has decided to add a woman to their entourage.
During the TGS afterparty, new cast member Danny admits to his boss, Jack, that he has been having an office romance but will not disclose the woman's name. While in attendance at a New York Knicks game, Jack asks more about the woman Danny is seeing and Danny reveals details, such as she has never let a man see her feet. This results in Jack's realization that the woman is Liz, and he is displeased.
Meanwhile, Jenna auditions for a role she believes is for a college freshman on Gossip Girl. At the audition, Jenna learns that she is actually booked to audition for the role of the college freshman's mother. She panics, believing that this is a sign that she is no longer young, and in an attempt to reclaim her youth, begins acting young which causes the TGS writing staff to mock her. At the same time, Tracy decides to add a woman to his entourage as a learning experience when he and his wife have a daughter. He brings in the French-Dutch TGS writer Sue Laroche-Van der Hout. Tracy later loses his temper with a crew member, thinking that he made a suggestive comment about Sue, causing Kenneth to tell Tracy that he has become paternal towards Sue. Soon after, Sue begins rebelling against him, as Tracy treats her as a child.
During the TGS after party, Danny's body paint had not washed off and could be seen under the black lights at the party. As he knows about Danny and Liz's relationship, Jack later uses a black light on Liz to reveal body paint all over her revealing to her that he knows about their relationship. Jack tells Liz to end the relationship, but she hesitates. Eventually, she tries to break if off with Danny, but when she sees him wearing a CHiPs costume, she changes her mind. Jack confronts Liz on the whereabouts of Danny, as Danny had skipped lunch with him, only for Jack to see Danny's CHiPs badge in her office. He orders her to end the relationship immediately, but Liz refuses, believing Jack is jealous. Simultaneously, Liz urges Jenna to come clean about her real age to the TGS staff, but Jenna balks at the idea. Liz tells Jenna if she tells everyone her real age, she will reveal her "friend Tom... Tom Selleck" her mustache, to which Jenna agrees. Later, Liz walks by the staff with the mustache in her face. Jenna thanks Liz for this, and as a result, Jenna accepts the role of the mother on Gossip Girl.
Knowing that Liz will not break off with Danny, Jack tells Danny he knows about the two. He lies to Danny by telling him he cares for Liz, hoping that Danny will end it with Liz, which he does. After Sue returns from a night of partying, Tracy tells her that all he wanted to do was be a father figure to her. Liz enters Tracy's dressing room—with the mustache intact—to take Sue back to the writers' room, as Liz had been looking for her. At the end, Tracy wonders if he can go through his experience with Sue if he has a daughter, to which Kenneth says he thinks he can.
Liz, along with Pete, decides to take the show's staff to Miami for a week, due to Liz's hate of the cold weather and the staff's case of "winter madness". Jack decides to take them to Boston instead, so he can see Nancy Donovan, a woman Jack ponders having a possible romance with. He learns that Nancy's husband has left her as a way of getting her to ask for a divorce, but Nancy refuses to do so, fearing what others might think. Jack admits his true feelings to Nancy and insists that the two talk. She suggests that they should say four words to each other as a way of putting their relationship on hold; Jack says to her "I'll wait. Not forever", while Nancy tells him "I'll try. Wicked hard."
Meanwhile Jenna, Frank, Toofer, Lutz, Sue Laroche-Van der Hout, Kenneth, Cerie and Danny vent their anger at Liz. They complain that Boston is colder than New York, and they do not like sharing an office with the all-male staff of Boston Bruins fans who write for the Bruins Beat. Liz gets a tip from Jack to find a common enemy in the Boston headquarters of NBC. Liz comes up with the name "Dale Snitterman", and tells the staff that Snitterman is causing all of their problems, not realizing until later that she had seen the name somewhere and did not make it up. At that point, the staff finds Snitterman and harass him.
At the same time, Tracy goes on Boston's Freedom Trail. He accuses the actor playing John Hancock that his character did not actually set all Americans free. When he tells him "Patriots suck!", he inadvertently says it near a group of New England Patriots fans. At the end of the episode, Hancock brings in the Crispus Attucks character and tells Tracy he does have black friends. When Hancock says he met Attucks in 1775, Tracy is able to one up him as he knows the Attucks was killed in the Boston Massacre in 1770.
Jenna learns that her mother, Verna, has come to visit her. Jenna does not want to see Verna, though, as she knows that her visit will lead to her asking Jenna for money; so Jenna turns to Jack for help. Jack—who also does not get along with his mother—shows Jenna a presentation on how to deal with overbearing mothers. Jenna, however, ignores what Jack says and reconciles with her mother, making Jack convinced that Verna has an ulterior motive for making amends with Jenna. Later, his suspicions come true when Verna admits that she sneaked her way back into her daughter's life solely to convince her to star in a reality show featuring them both. Instead of letting Jenna know about her mother's true intentions, Jack pays Verna off to visit Jenna on a regular basis, letting Jenna believe her mother has changed her ways.
At the same time, Liz takes her staff writer, Frank in as a roommate, and they both decide to make a pact to give up their bad habits: Liz eating junk food and Frank's smoking. As they continue living together, Liz is having a hard time adjusting to not eating junk food, and suspects that Frank is still smoking, due to his calm behavior during the situation. To catch him in the act, she decides to hide a recording video camera equipped with night vision in her apartment. The next day, Liz shows the video to her staff writers, including Frank. However, instead of showing Frank smoking cigarettes, the footage shows Liz sleepwalking and eating large amounts of junk food, thus embarrassing herself and breaking the pact.
To avoid feeling lonely on Valentine's Day, Liz schedules a needed root canal on that day, but soon realizes she will need someone to escort her home from the dentist's office due to the after effects of anesthesia. She asks her colleagues for a ride home, but for various reasons they cannot do it. As a result of this, Liz calls the dentist's office and says that she does not have anyone to pick her up. However, the receptionist informs her that after her procedure she can leave alone if she signs a liability waiver. Later, after receiving the document, Liz begins to sign it, but ultimately decides against it.
Meanwhile, Jack makes an appearance on the fictional CNBC show The Hot Box. During the appearance Jack interacts with the show's host, Avery Jessup, with the two flirting during the broadcast. The two share Republican viewpoints, and Avery asks Jack out for a drink, which he accepts. They eventually embark on a number of both successful and unsuccessful dates. During one of those dates, Jack invites her to the TGS VIP party, whereupon he enlists the help of musician Jon Bon Jovi, to come over to them and converse, and impress her. When Bon Jovi approaches them, though, Jack disregards him due to his own intriguing conversation with Avery. After the TGS party, the two go back to Jack's apartment and end up sleeping together, resulting in the two beginning a relationship.
At the same time, Jenna begins to worry that her stalker, has lost interest in her. Jenna tracks down Maynard and her suspicions are confirmed, after he tells her that his therapist encouraged him to stop his obsession with her and move forward. Later Kenneth finds Jenna upset in her dressing room. She tells him why she is in that state and shows him letters that Maynard sent to her in the past. Kenneth, however, is confused as to why Jenna misses her stalker, leading her to reveal that Maynard has been the longest relationship she has ever had. The next day, Jenna enters her dressing room and sees that her picture is inscribed with the words "I want to eat your Boogers." Jenna immediately knows Kenneth did this, due to his reaction towards it, and thanks him for his thoughtfulness.
On Valentine's Day, Liz goes to her dentist appointment and tells the receptionist that she did not sign the waiver. After her surgery, Liz reassures the dental staff that the anesthesia is having no effect on her and can take herself home. In the lobby, Liz sees her former boyfriends Drew Baird, Dennis Duffy and Floyd DeBarber and is moved that they came back so that she not be alone on Valentine's Day. Liz, however, is hallucinating and mistakes Drew, Dennis, and Floyd for the three Jamaican women dental assistants who are actually there. One of them calls Jack, Liz's boss, asking if he could come pick up Liz and take her home, which he does.
Liz comes across an unrecognized contact in her cellphone listed as "future husband", and realizes that it must be a man she met at her dental appointment, while awakening from anesthesia in the recovery room after root canal surgery. She calls the number, pretends to be the Jamaican dental receptionist, and asks the man to come back to see Dr. Kaplan. At the appointed time, she returns to the dentist's office, but does not recognize anyone there; so she calls the number again. When the man answers, she sees him and hangs up. Unbeknownst to Liz, her number is already listed in his cellphone under "future wife". He calls her back upon seeing she called, and they arrange a date; she learns that his name is Wesley. On their date, the two fail to hit it off, as they annoy each other. Later, at the 30 Rock studios, Liz discovers that Wesley was the person who retrieved Kenneth's wallet, after Kenneth threw it out of a window earlier. Because of this coincidence, Liz and Wesley decide to go on another date.
At the same time, Jack's aspirations of becoming CEO comes to a halt when his girlfriend and CNBC host, Avery Jessup informs him that the Philadelphia-based cable company Kabletown is rumored to be buying NBC. Jack tells her that no sale is pending as he believes that his mentor and Don Geiss would not agree to such deal. As rumors persist, Jack panics, but things get worse when he learns from former GE chairman Jack Welch that Don Geiss has been dead for weeks and that the company negotiated a takeover with Kabletown. Welch kept Geiss's death a secret while negotiations took place. The next day, Jack watches Avery's program, The Hot Box, and it is confirmed that the buyout has gone forward.
Elsewhere, Tracy does a one-man show so that he get a Tony Award as part of his EGOT quest. His show receives positive reviews, and is convinced that he will win a Tony, but Jenna tells him that in order for him to qualify for the award he must do his one-man show eight times, which does not sit well with Tracy as he is unable to do anything twice. He asks for Jenna's help, which she at first refuses. She eventually agrees to help him, however, and tries to teach Tracy the principles of acting. This leads nowhere, resulting in the two arguing and Jenna telling him he can go on his show and read the phone book for all she cares. At the end of the episode, Tracy reads the phone book at his show, making Jenna very proud of him.
Liz tries to avoid meeting with Wesley Snipes, the British man she met and flirted with while under the influence of anesthesia. Liz finds him to be annoying, but they continuously run into each other, which leads them to believe they are meant to be together. However, Liz and Wesley soon come to terms that the anesthesia is the cause of whatever they went through and agree to stop seeing each other. But, when they run into each other again, Wesley states they should probably just settle for each other. Liz becomes horrified at this idea and leaves the location.
Meanwhile Jack tries to research the fictitious company network Kabletown, and find a way he can contribute. A former colleague, Dave Hess, who left NBC for Kabletown, reveals that it runs pay-per-view adult channels; the perfect business. On hearing this, Jack is horrified at the prospect of no longer making things. Later, however, while giving the eulogy at former CEO Don Geiss's funeral, he has an epiphany and proposes to Kabletown executives that they produce "porn for women" (specifically, channels featuring attractive men who "listen" while women blather on).
At the same time, Tracy's nanny writes a tell-all book, revealing that he has never actually had an affair with anyone, a secret he had shared only with Jack in "The Ones". In order to restore his womanizing persona, Tracy holds a press conference announcing he is leaving show business to spend more time with a stripper, but no one buys it. In addition, women come forward and admit that they did not have sex with Tracy. Jenna gives him advice regarding this, explaining that he should sleep with someone so that he not be labeled as monogamous. This ends up leading him to try and have sex with Liz, which she refuses.
Liz gets a surprise phone call from her ex-boyfriend, Floyd DeBarber, who says he will be coming to New York and wants to have dinner with her. She begins to hope that the two can get back together, however, while watching The Today Show she discovers that he is getting married to a woman named Kaitlin. Jack warns her not to attempt revenge; nevertheless, Liz invites Floyd to a seafood restaurant where she had food poisoning on three separate occasions. He does not get food poisoning, but instead, Floyd, a recovering alcoholic, gets drunk off of the whiskey-based fish sauce. The two get into an argument, and after Floyd insults her, Liz leaves the restaurant. The next day, Floyd appears on The Today Show, but still drunk from the night before, refuses to leave the 30 Rock building. Liz apologizes to both Floyd and Kaitlin for getting him drunk. They accept the apology, and Kaitlin asks Liz to be a participant in their wedding, to which she agrees.
At the same time, jealous of the publicity that Danny is getting after receiving a Juno Award nomination, Frank, Toofer and Lutz print a fake, embarrassing New York Times interview with him and circulate it throughout the 30 Rock building. Danny brings the upsetting article to Jack, but Jack quickly figures out that Frank, Toofer, and Lutz are the ones behind it. To get back at them, Jack and Danny trick them into stripping in front of the TGS dancers. Frank, Toofer, and Lutz, however, discover a secret code from a prank society that Jack belonged to while attending Princeton University. Frank realizes he can use this to manipulate him, which works. As a result of this, Jack threatens to sleep with Frank's mother, which prompts them to ease off on their pranks.
Finally, to keep Jenna and Tracy distracted from Danny's fanfare Pete sends them to the makeup department to have plaster face-prints made while Kenneth talks to them. Jenna and Tracy are plagued by erotic dreams involving Kenneth, and to stop having them, they decide to stay awake. This fails, so they decide to deal with it à la A Nightmare on Elm Street, by killing Kenneth in their dreams. They wake up (believing they are still dreaming) and attack Kenneth. Witnessing this, Pete tells them they are wide awake, and that it is morning, which prompts Jenna and Tracy to realize that they slept through the night without having any dreams of Kenneth.
Jack's advances with CNBC host Avery Jessup are called into question when he learns that his high school sweetheart, Nancy Donovan, has finally been divorced from her husband. Jack spends evenings having dinner and wine with both, against Liz's suggestion that it is a bad idea. He compares Nancy to actor Lee Marvin, after watching a movie marathon starring Marvin, and Avery to baseball player Derek Jeter, after he spends time with Avery at Jeter's home. Jack is torn between them and does not know who to choose.
Meanwhile, Liz attends singles activities at the YMCA and Jenna joins her as her wingman. Nancy accompanies Liz to one of the activities, and tells her to focus not on the negative but on what she does want from a man, after Liz had an unsuccessful conversation with a man. The following day, at a dodgeball game, Liz takes the advice, and she tells a man whom she hit in the face during a previous dodgeball game, what traits she wants from a man, but the man does not speak English, and as a result, Liz hits the man with a ball. Later, Nancy asks Liz how it went, but Liz tells her that it did not work out.
Finally, Toofer learns he may have been hired as a writer on TGS because of affirmative action and quits. Liz is reluctant to rehire him until Pete reveals to Liz that she was also hired by affirmative action. When Toofer returns, he demands that no one call him "Toofer" anymore, but when everyone comes up with more insulting nicknames he gives up.
Jack distracts himself from his romantic problems involving the choice between Avery Jessup and Nancy Donovan by attempting to resolve a dispute between two janitors, Subhas and Khonani. Five years ago, Khonani signed a contract to take the 11:30 p.m. janitorial shift from Subhas and informs Jack that he is ready to start at the new time. Jack grants him permission, and calls a meeting with Subhas informing him that Khonani will take over the 11:30 shift. Subhas is not happy with this, so Jack decides to move him to 10:00 p.m., which Subhas has no problem with. As he begins his scheduled shift, Khonani is unhappy with it as there is no trash to pick up because Subhas has already collected it. Khonani complains to Jack about this, resulting in Jack returning Subhas to 11:30, and Khonani leaving NBC to work at Foxwoods Resort Casino.
Meanwhile, Liz is distraught to learn that although her writing staff sometimes hang out after work, they never invite her. She tells Jack about this, however, Jack explains that it is best for her to keep her distance from them. Later Cerie announces that her wedding is back on and that Liz and Jenna need to plan a bachelorette party for her. Liz decides to have the party at her apartment and prove to her employees that she can be fun to be with. At the bachelorette party, staff members Pete, Frank, James Toofer and Lutz show up, but want to leave as they are not having a good time. Liz gets upset about this, calls them out for not inviting her to hang out with them and demands that they apologize to her.
At the same time, Tracy is torn between his commitments to his pregnant wife and his desire to party. He asks Kenneth to assist with any of Angie's needs, however, it becomes too much for Kenneth to deal with and he tells Tracy that he needs to be with her instead. Tracy realizes he needs to be with Angie, but changes his mind and goes to a strip club. After returning home and in order to stay there, Tracy decides to wear his dog's shock collar on himself. Tracy then sends Kenneth to take his place at Liz's party. Unbeknownst to Kenneth, Tracy's dog has followed him to the bachelorette party. Kenneth bursts in Liz's home with Tracy's dog right behind him, resulting in the staff hiding from the dog after it attacks them. They all turn to Liz to get rid of the dog, which she at first refuses. She eventually agrees to help them, after they tell her she is a mother figure to them and finding comfort in the title. Liz distracts the dog, and the staff exits her apartment unharmed.
Tracy announces to the TGS staff that Grizz will be getting married at the end of the month. A problem immediately ensues after Grizz cannot decide between Tracy and "Dot Com" to be his best man. Grizz then asks Liz to help him convince Tracy that Dot Com should be his best man. The two suggest another task Tracy can do at the wedding, but Tracy insists on being the best man. Later, Liz learns that Dot Com is in love with Grizz's fiancée, Feyoncé, Grizz is not aware of this, and that the only reason Tracy wanted to be the best man was to protect Dot Com. Finally, after changing Grizz's mind about Dot Com as his best man, Grizz appoints Liz as his woman of honor at his wedding instead.
Meanwhile, Liz and Pete are suspicious that Jenna's new boyfriend Paul L'Astname is using her. The two follow Paul to a bar and find out that Paul is a Jenna impersonator. The next day, Liz asks Jenna if she knows what Paul does, though, Jenna is aware that Paul is a Jenna impersonator, having met him at a Jenna Maroney impersonator contest. Liz does not approve of the relationship, and so she confronts Paul on what his intentions are with Jenna. Paul tells her that he is not using Jenna to further his career, but that he is with her because she accepts him for who he is. Liz is convinced and approves of their relationship.
At the same time, Jack is informed by Don Geiss's estate lawyer that he is in Don Geiss's will. Jack is excited at the idea of owning a piece of Geiss's legacy as Jack considered Geiss his mentor. At the will reading, Jack inherits Geiss's beloved pet peacock named Argus. When Argus begins acting peculiar, Jack enlists the help of Kenneth. Kenneth tells Jack that Argus muttered senpai and kōhai—master and pupil—nicknames that Geiss and Jack had for each other. Immediately, Jack is convinced that Geiss's soul has inhabited Argus, prompting Jack to release his grief to Argus and finally accepting Geiss's death.
Liz brings her boss Jack a budget approval on the show's planned Mother's Day episode by gathering around its cast and staff mothers. Liz reminds Jack that Mother's Day is coming up, prompting Jack to realize he forgot to send his mother flowers and informs his office assistant Jonathan to send her flowers, however, Colleen is waiting outside Jack's office door. Colleen's real reason for visiting her son is that she learned from her friend in Florida that Jack is dating Nancy Donovan, a recent divorcée, and a woman who happens to be Jack's high school sweetheart. During dinner, Colleen does not bring Nancy up, but tells Jack she knows about his involvement with Avery Jessup after an awkward exchange she had with Avery in an elevator prior to her dinner with Jack; because of the awkward moment with her, Colleen believes that Avery and Jack are sleeping together. Colleen is appalled that Jack is dating two women at the same time, and demands that he end it and make a choice between Nancy and Avery.
While trying on her bridesmaid's dress in the TGS fitting room, Colleen, Sylvia Rossitano and Verna Maroney criticize Liz for not being married by now as she is in her late thirties, but Liz does not care what they think. Later, Liz has a conversation with her mother regarding Liz being single. During their conversation, Margaret reveals that her true love was Buzz Aldrin and not Liz's father which shocks Liz. She tells Jack about what her mother has revealed to her and ponders why her mother did not choose to be with Buzz. Jack offers to introduce her to Buzz with Liz accepting, and wanting to find out what her mother missed out on. During their meet, Buzz confesses that it was a good decision that Margaret did not stay with him as he spent many of his years as an alcoholic. After her encounter with Buzz, Liz tells her mother that she respects the decision she made by not ending up with Buzz.
At the same time, Verna visits Jack in hopes of getting the rest of the money he promised to give her in the episode "Verna" but Jack will give her the rest of the money once he believes Jenna is happy around her. While discussing what to wear for the Mother's Day episode, Verna suggests that Jenna wear an outfit that she made, but Jenna does not want to. Nonetheless, Verna and Jenna make up and wear each other's clothes on the broadcast. Meanwhile, Pete learns that Tracy does not know where his mother is, so he decides to cast actress Novella Nelson to be his mother for the Mother's Day episode. Tracy and Novella have a dislike to one another, however, the two make amends with each other and sing together on the holiday episode.
Liz is dateless for ex-boyfriend Floyd's wedding, and does not want to be alone. She revisits her old boyfriends but the visits do not go well. Later, at a party, Liz learns from Cerie that she will be seated next to Wesley, at Cerie's wedding. As a result of this, Liz invites Wesley as her date to Floyd's wedding. At the wedding, Wesley reveals that he has lost his job, and needs Liz to get him U.S. residency, and proposes marriage to her. After an unsuccessful conversation with Astronaut Mike Dexter Liz agrees to marry Wesley.
Meanwhile, Jack is still in a dilemma in who to choose from between Avery Jessup and Nancy Donovan. Avery decides not to be Jack's date to Cerie's wedding, and that while she is gone, Jack should think about whether or not he wants to be with her. As soon as Avery leaves, Nancy shows up at the 30 Rock building unannounced, and decides to spend the weekend with Jack. Liz tries to talk him out of going on a date with Nancy, after he asked her for advice. He decides to keep things platonic with Nancy, so that no problem ensues in his decision to choose between them, but Jack ends up sleeping with Nancy. The next morning, Nancy admits that the two spending the night together was a big deal, as Jack was the first man she slept with after her divorce. At Floyd's wedding, Jack tells Nancy about Avery, and as a result, Nancy threatens to leave him forever once the ceremony is over. While Liz gives a reading, Jack texts her to stall, resulting in Liz reading inappropriate scripture recitations at the wedding.
Finally, Tracy informs "Dot Com" and Kenneth that he wishes to be part of the film Garfield 3: Feline Groovy. Dot Com and Kenneth tell Tracy that he should instead focus on his chances of getting an Oscar, as part of his EGOT quest. The two encourage him to audition for Hard To Watch, a story of an inner-city boy living in the ghetto, something that Tracy can directly relate to. Tracy decides to audition for Hard To Watch, but realizes that playing the role may bring up too many repressed memories. Dot Com and Kenneth, along with Tracy, visit all the places from Tracy's childhood in order to prepare him for the role, but this backfires when Tracy is brought to tears because of his past.
The episode starts where the previous one ended, at Kaitlin and Floyd's wedding. Liz, who is scheduled to do a reading at the ceremony, wastes time so that Jack, after sending her a text message to stall for time, can talk things over with Nancy Donovan. He has admitted to Nancy that he is in love with both her and Avery Jessup, but she cannot cope with what Jack has told her. The two talk the situation over, and Jack eventually tells Nancy that he cares for her and decides he wants to be with her.
After Floyd's wedding, Liz goes to the office of Wesley Snipes, to retrieve his shoes for Cerie's wedding. At Wesley's office, she meets an airline pilot named Carol. When she learns that Carol is a big fan of TGS, for which Liz is the head writer, she asks Carol to go with her to Cerie's wedding, which he accepts. At Cerie's wedding, Wesley is distraught that Liz ended their engagement through a text message she sent to him. Liz tells him that fate brought them together so that she would meet Carol, with whom she can see herself spending the rest of her life. Wesley is devastated and leaves. Unbeknownst to Liz, Carol, who Liz thought had stepped out from the party area, heard everything she told Wesley, which shocks Carol, prompting him to leave. At the same time, at Cerie's wedding, Nancy learns that Avery is pregnant after having a conversation with her in the ladies room, and tells Jack before she leaves him. When Jack finds Avery, he tells her he wants to marry her, which she accepts.
Meanwhile, Kenneth is notified by Pete that he has received a promotion as "junior-in-charge-boy of the entire NBC page program" but that he will have to move out to Los Angeles, which does not sit well with Kenneth. Kenneth tells Tracy about this, but Tracy advises him to do a lousy job so that he loses the promotion. While giving a tour around the 30 Rock building, Kenneth does a terrible job, and as a result of his behavior, Pete is forced to dismiss him. At the same time, Jenna is shocked to see her boyfriend and Jenna impersonator, Paul, dressed as singer Cher. At Feyoncé and Grizz's wedding, which is being held at the TGS set, Jenna is not amused that Paul showed up dressed as Cher, but is surprised that Paul is dressed as her on his left side and Cher on his right, and as a result, the two make-up. Later, at Grizz's wedding, Jack tells Liz that Carol is looking for her. Carol tells Liz that he would like to give her a chance so that the two can have a relationship. At the same time, Kenneth, who is drunk, gets on stage, and gives and a ranting speech to his former co-workers.
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